feeling so alone even surounded by others. I woke up twice this nigth,but in my dream. I was in a huge house open on a garden. It was windy, muddy, leaves were flying everywhere and everything was flying and turning in the house. Loved it. I could contrôle the wind and the water and start pushing all of what was in the house. He came to bed an hour before I woke up. Like nearly every night for a month. Sometime he just never come to bed. I told him to wake me up if he couldn't sleep. Bring me coffee or just kiss me, but nothing. He just entered the bedroom, phone light on, ask the dog to move from my arms and slipped between the sheets. He new I was awake because I moved gently my fluffy baby... nut nothing. He even growl when I scratch his knee with my toe as I turned to hug him. But for him he is just depressed... nut it has always been like this. I do the things, i tell him I'm not good, I tell him to do the washing, I tell him to clean his teeth, to clean the house with me or when I'm at work. But nothing.... I was still half sleepy but it hurts not to be heard. I'm not sur i still love him. He is so ... childish, unaware, selfish... I need to breath again